How to host a games night that actually works

Invitations: how many people, and who

The number of guests decides half the evening. With five to eight people almost every group game works: there are enough of you to bluff and argue, but nobody waits too long for their turn. With three or four, lean towards smaller, cosier games; with more than ten the night changes character and you need teams and a few different tricks, which we cover in games for large groups.

Say in the invitation that there will be games. It sounds obvious, but it spares the guest who was expecting a quiet chat from suddenly having to act out a flamingo. One line is enough: “Friday at mine, 8 pm, food first and then games.” If you plan to use an online room, where everyone plays on their own phone, ask people to arrive with a charged battery; if a single phone is going to be passed around, yours will do.

As for the mix of people, a couple of “bridges” (friends who know both halves of the group) are worth more than any icebreaker. If Sophie is bringing her partner who doesn’t know anyone, seat him next to her for the first games, then put him on a team with someone outgoing later on, once he has found his feet.

Setting up the room before the doorbell rings

The ideal shape is a circle. Everyone needs to see everyone else’s face, because half of any bluffing game is played on expressions. A sofa plus a few chairs facing it works better than a long dining table, where whoever sits at the far ends ends up cut off from the conversation.

• Light: enough to read a sheet of paper and see faces clearly. Cosy cinema gloom helps neither the person miming nor the person drawing.
• A clear space of a couple of metres in front of the group, if you are planning movement games such as Charades. Move the coffee table beforehand, not halfway through a round.
• Paper and pens for everyone, even if you are playing on a phone: you will want them for keeping score, for Name, Place, Thing and for the classic games that need nothing else.
• A charger within reach of the sofa, and the phone that will act as the “middle of the table” turned up to full brightness.
• Music low or off during word games: someone trying to catch a half-whispered clue can’t compete with the speakers.

Food and drink that won’t spoil the game

The rule is simple: everything should be easy to pick up with one hand, with no cutlery and no greasy fingers. The phone will be passed from hand to hand, and so will the score sheets.

• Yes: breadsticks, crudités with thick dips, small squares of flatbread, finger sandwiches, nuts, cocktail sausages on sticks, cubes of cheese.
• Best avoided: very greasy crisps, buttered popcorn, chicken wings, slices of pizza that drip, flaky sausage rolls and anything else that leaves crumbs down the sofa cushions.
• Glasses you can tell apart: a coloured hair tie or a name in marker pen. Halfway through a game nobody remembers which one was theirs.

Put the food on a side table, not in the middle of the circle: that spot is reserved for the phone or the score sheet. And plan a proper ten-minute break halfway through, when people get up, refill their plates and chat. Without a break attention drops and the games turn into background noise. If the whole thing starts with a sit-down meal, the timings are different: you will find specific ideas in games for a dinner party.

A running order in three acts

A games night has an arc, like a gig: you open with something light, build up to the headline act and finish before tiredness takes over. For an evening of roughly two and a half hours, here is one possible plan.

Warm-up (20–30 minutes)

Short games, rules you can explain in a sentence, nobody left alone in the spotlight. Would You Rather fits the bill: every question offers two options, and in an online room each person chooses in secret on their own phone until the result appears for everyone. A round of Most Likely To also warms the room up nicely, as long as your guests already know each other a little.

The main game (60–80 minutes)

This is the moment for the game that needs the most brainpower: bluffing, teams, strategy. With six to eight people, Impostor holds up well over many games in a row, because the roles are reshuffled every round and whoever was under suspicion becomes the accuser. With a group that loves competition, Forbidden Word in teams gets people cheering and stirs up some friendly rivalry. Don’t switch games every ten minutes: once the rules have sunk in, the fun grows with every round you play.

The wind-down (15–20 minutes)

At the end you want something that can be stopped at any moment: a few turns of Charades, a round of Who Am I? with the phone held to someone’s forehead, a couple of light questions. Stop while the group is still laughing, not when half of them are already checking the time: that is the memory your guests will take home.

Choosing games to suit the group and the mood

Before you decide, ask yourself three questions: how well do the guests know each other, how much energy do they have tonight, and how much do they care about winning?

• They barely know each other: go for games that don’t require knowing anything about the others, such as Forbidden Word or Doodle Guess, where drawing badly is half the fun. Questions about people can wait until the ice is broken.
• Friends of many years: this is ideal territory for Most Likely To and for bluffing games, because knowing everyone’s faces makes every suspicion that much juicier.
• Shattered after a long week: no long rules. Questions, riddles and games that last a few minutes are a better bet.
• Fiercely competitive: team games, where the rivalry is spread across the group, or cooperative ones such as Word in Bloom, where you all win or lose together.
• A wide range of ages: if children or grandparents are coming, read family games for all ages.

Always have a plan B: a simpler back-up game you can bring out if the main one never takes off.

The host: director, not star of the show

Whoever organises the evening has one clear job: make the night work, not win it. In practice that means explaining the rules, keeping the pace and noticing who is drifting to the edges.

• Explain the rules in a minute, then play a practice round: people learn far faster by playing than by listening. There are a few tricks in how to explain the rules of a game.
• With shy guests, offer less exposed roles: keeping score, refereeing the forbidden words, reading the questions out loud. Many loosen up after the first round; few do if pushed into the spotlight cold.
• With the over-competitive, make it clear at the start that the scores reset with every game, and alternate team games with cooperative ones. If Josh disputes every point, make him the referee: someone who has to be impartial soon stops arguing.
• Read the room: if two people are scrolling on their phones and someone disappears into the kitchen every ten minutes, change game or take a break rather than pushing on.
• Play too, but leave the best moments to your guests: the first turn miming, the first round giving the clues.

The mistakes that ruin a games night (and how to avoid them)

1. Too many games on the list. Two or three are plenty; with a list of eight you end up spending half an hour choosing.
2. Starting with the most complicated game. Save long rules for when everyone is in the mood, not while the last guests are taking their coats off.
3. Waiting for latecomers before starting. Begin with something open-ended that new arrivals can join on the next round.
4. In-jokes that leave people out. Questions about stories only three people know turn everyone else into an audience.
5. Going on too late. The last hour of an evening that drags wipes out the first two. Far better to wrap up with the promise of a rematch.
6. A flat phone. If the game runs on a single phone, put it on charge during the break.

And if the evening just doesn’t take off? It happens. Change game without any fuss, suggest a classic that needs nothing, from Twenty Questions to Telephone, or simply let the conversation take over: the point was a good time together, and games are only a means to that end. For ideas that cost nothing at all, see games with no equipment.